John Stamos, aka Uncle Jesse on “Full House” and “Fuller House,” is a gorgeous man. Like, really gorgeous. So much so, I don’t think he can ever take a bad photo. Plus, he’s a complete GILF on his new show “Grandfathered.”
Over the years, we’ve seen Stamos go from a mullet to a much shorter ’do. He’s shared several #TBT pics on Instagram, and none of them — I repeat, none of them — were awkward. Everyone’s had that awkward kid or teenage stage, everyone but Stamos that is. He’s the man of the hour, and I think I speak for everyone when I ask, “What is your secret?!”
To prove this assumption, let’s start at the beginning:
Baby John is excruciatingly adorable. His smile/teeth are great, his hair is cowlick-free and even his shirt is cool. All my childhood pics are the exactopposite of this one.Teenage John is a complete dreamboat.
First, how lucky is that girl? She can literally say she was Uncle Jesse’s prom date. Second, Stamos managed to pull off a white suit. Third, his late ’70s/early ’80s hair was sheer brilliance.Denim + John 4Ever
Stamos rocked the denim jacket-and-no-shirt look, a feat achieved by very few in the course of Earth’s history.The mullet look
Warner Bros.Seriously, no one pulled off an ’80s mullet better than Stamos. NO. ONE.His “Cabaret” look?
Nailed it. Make up and all.A photo with some profile action?
Nailed that, too.Turtlenecks?
Suddenly sexy.Camo shorts?
Not a problem.The ’90s hair angst?
Works for him.Smiling with teeth?
Check.Smiling without teeth?
Just as good.Beard game?
Strong. Very strong.Bundled up?
Yes, please.Not bundled up?
YES, PLEASE.Whatever’s happening here.
Instead of just looking like a douche, Stamos just looks like the guy you would definitely take home from the bar.Standing next to two-thirds of the Jonas Brothers while looking super serious?
Wait, there were Jonas Brothers in that pic?Making funny faces with costar Josh Peck?
Even when he tries to make a strange face, he still looks great. That jawline though.Oh, and the sheet mask look?
Not even bad. He still has model-perfect lips and clear, sharp eyes.
Seriously, John. Are you a robot or something?! True, you could be taking 20 pics before posting the one you like best on Instagram, but I don’t think that’s what you’re doing. You’re probably a one-and-done pic person. Which, 1. isn’t fair, and 2. something truly desirable, now that we’re all stuck in this selfie-obsessed world.
So, do us all a favor and tell us your secret of never taking a bad photo. We need to know. Please and thank you.
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